Day 14 | Caught in a Story

Merry Wheaton | Wheaton, Illinois | December 10, 2016

Merry Wheaton | Wheaton, Illinois | December 10, 2016

I have pushed it away for months, so today it felt foreign. 

It all was right: the usual suspects and familiar corners, new places to explore, and a welcoming sense of home. I look out the front window at the lamp post in the snow and half expect Mr. Tumnus to be holding an umbrella for Lucy. 

Half of me wants to run from itI emailed a lady in the Canary Islands today and applied to work at a bed and breakfast from June until October. A series of minutes later, I was doing the same in Bangladesh, Sri Lanka, and the Philippines. I brainstorm photography projects in Ukraine, plot out passport stamps in South America, and scribble idealist essays into my notebooks. The pages fill, and so does my external hard drive. It is a dangerous way to live when paper is far from scarce and the words flow faster than my ink.

My mind repeats like a broken record: Decide. Decide. Decide. 

I walked out of Lindy's house, and Mr. Hart was on a ladder hanging Christmas lights, the snow was falling, and my brother was waiting to pick me up. 

Caught | Sosua, Dominican Republic | May 2015

Caught | Sosua, Dominican Republic | May 2015

Yesterday, Reagan National and I waited together watching five flights fill. Answering the question about where I live has been nothing short of creatively condensing thousands of stories that end, "My best friend is a flight attendant for United Airlines."

Walden | Jarabacoa, Dominican Republic | October 2015

Walden | Jarabacoa, Dominican Republic | October 2015

Tonight, I found old GoPro footage and photos when I attempted to make a video short of Steve and me shoveling snow only to find it full. 

Thinking of it now, I do not know why this Advent has taken me so much by surprise. The past three years have been nothing but surprising and full stories I could not write. 

Story Catching | Sosua, Dominican Republic | October 2015

Story Catching | Sosua, Dominican Republic | October 2015

In 2013 my heart told me to stay, but the Lord told me to go. He would bring me back, He promised, and though painful, I had no doubt.

Perhaps this waiting should not be so surprising but rather expected. We expect to wait, knowing this story is far from complete yet so full of hope. 

The waiting is constant, yet the joy has returned. I think I just needed to be reminded that being caught in the Lord's story is the greatest freedom that I shall ever know. 

 

Daily Readings

Sirach 48:1-11
Psalm 80:2-19
Matthew 17:9-13

A Hope Expected | Baní, Dominican Republic | March 2016

A Hope Expected | Baní, Dominican Republic | March 2016